I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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