the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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