Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
