why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
