Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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