I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize