Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
