did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
