we have pet lesbian snakes
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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