Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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