I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
