I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
