She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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