A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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