YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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