Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize