im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
