so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
