It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
