***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Are we still banned from the library?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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