There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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