She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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