Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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