Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
