I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
