: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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