K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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