At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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