Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i may or may not be watching the land before time
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Come on in and take your pants off
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