Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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