this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
