I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize