just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize