No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I'm jealous of your bromance
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
