break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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