dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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