we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
