meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize