she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
