you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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