I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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