at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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