Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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