have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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