Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
only you would photoshop your dick
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize