My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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