I hope mine doesn't look like that
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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