it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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