Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
