I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
